For the Love of Dina And Azalea

For... She Wanted to Win!

2009-11-11T19:23:00.000-08:00

It happen quite sometimes ago (masa tuh rambut dia pon panjang lagi) during our wait for papa, who's buying us dinner, in our little car. The incident been hanging in my head ever since, it potrays her a lot as a big sister.

She asked me 'Mama ni apa?'

and I said ' huruf X?'

She said ' BUKANNNN....' in denial tone

Mama 'abis ape?'

She said ' ni pangkah la...'

Mama 'sama la!..cikgu kakak ajar huruf X tak? kan sama'

She said 'ajar, tapi nih kakak buat pangkah!!...'

Alahai... yer lah kakak...

And she will be big sister after all ;). Mama already 28 weeks,God Bless.. Allahuakbar..

And SHE = ME?

And since she was small, papa said she resembles me in many ways, physically and attitude, and manjaness.. Hoping she and her siblings grows up to be Hamba Allah yang berguna. Aminnn

For... she is Big Fat Liar??!!

2009-08-14T23:13:00.000-07:00

I dont know why she has to keep lying to me..

All over again.. I've known her around a year ago or maybe more. But I frankly do not understand why she keep on lying to me? Selfish? Or she is not sure I can handle the truth?

Come on... be BRAVE. We are all adult. We are 30 this year, we are not 13 YO teenagers..

I think its ok for her to be selfish, but liar??

To my beloved kids, PLEASE... Lying, liar, being one, they doesnt run in our genetics. Be frank... even it cost you..

Would you rather lie and lost a friend? or tell the truth and move ON?

You choose...

For... It is what matters most

2009-08-10T10:29:00.000-07:00

I am smiling right now... *smile*

First, because after 3 months, I finally stayed up again.. hahah...

Secondly, because I was jotting something over this personal blog of mine ;)

I got quite a few enquiries like 'busy ka? lama x update blog'... or 'update la blog, nk tau ape citer skrg'

I missed a lot of event, I mean I planned to blog about them, but as ideas flowing they finally gone with the wind...

- Birthday Azalea on 5th May

- Birthday Dina on 16th June

- Rayyan now already talk like a month ago at the age of One year and Five months..

- And my own anniversary on 4th of July

Regret? No.

All the event involve the love of my life, my babies and my beloved husband. Yes like others, i plan to blog so that one day, my kids will be able to read them -- my thought. But then, I suddenly realised.. its ok not to blog or if I dont have time to blog isnt it? What's make my life almost perfect is the fact that they are by my side. So what am I doing blogging when I should be by their side..?

I dun have that much time to blog at my office, my job permit me, but my work doesnt. Before, I do have time to be online after midnite, even I got a few questions from my online fren..'What the heck I'm doing at weee hour like this?'.. Actually its the only time I got to be online without sacrificing my time with my 3 babies (2 kids actually). Lately I do find I love spending time watching TVs the whole evening with them. I just sat there. Rayyan on my lap, sometimes Dina, sometimes Azalea. Papa will draw picture with them, reading for them, singing together, and of course leaving the house in mess.. LOL..

But we are having so much fun.. When Rayyan was small, or back then when Azalea was small, yes I have time to be online during prime time. But NO, not nowadays. I sometimes have some work to finish, and when Rayyan sees me opening my lappy.. he will come near and ask me to pick him up.. And usually I did... Oh I love them so much. Allahuakbar who gave them to me, syukran ya Allah.

So i cant deny them in my space of time. I was lucky I have time at office for myself to check emails and answer emails. Back then when I was new in this company, the VC made his 100 days speech. Usually about what you can contribute to your company, but he did says about company knows that workers/staff do take times to read emails and answering them. It ok with the company. But nothing was said about blogging and chatting isnt it? they even barred the YM before.. hehee..

Pendekata, haha...I have every reasons why I didnt blog be it during nite or office hour. Even my job is not that busy..

I will 'insyaAllah' blog once in a while ...some thought are meant to be poured. But not everything. InsyaAllah there's nothing to be regret.. I will one day told them 'stories of us' directly to them. Like my mom did. Mak and Abah always tell me 'awak dulu masa kecil...'... atau 'kita dulu dh pergi here n there.....'

And in my little space in my mind, I wanted the memories to be filled with their movement, gesture, thousand faces, their smiles, their little step taken, ...not with memories of me busy updating my blog, or being online, or busy about my own doing, or busy with my own job and work..

How can I miss this cheeky Azalea's smile..

Face that shines in morning sun...

He raised his eyebrows when he looked at me or his papa..

Muahhhss...

The daughters who helps a lot and doing mess a lot? Mekasih kakak tolong mama jaga adik2..

A sister to her beloved baby brother and her baby sister

But I really wanted to say kudos! to mommies blogger out there who has 3 kids or more, and also an active blogger. It really meant a lot when they shared tips on parenting, recipes, stories that help others to decide and many more.

For ...If I can... I dare you...

2009-04-19T03:17:00.000-07:00

Hahah... while breastfeeding Rayyan just now, I was thinking of this one :

" If I can ....(fill in the blank with something impossible)....
I will NOT .....(fill in the blank)....
because ....(fill in the blank)....."

Ekeke... I've been around and see people been answering TAG
Dare to answer mine? ;-)

My ANSWER will be this :

" If I can fly
I will not wear baju kurung anymore
because someone might sees what was not supposed to be seen..." hahahah

I would love to see how these people answer this one..hehe

1) Aliz_j
2) French_fry
3) Aneeza
4) Asu
5) Limau
6) Dora
7) Ira
8) Wawi

;P

For yesterday is another story..

2009-04-12T16:26:00.000-07:00

This entry was nothing actually to blog about... I just have this sudden urge to jot about it. My 3 lovely kids is sleeping and papa is in front of me. Browsing thru his 'manga'. Which I kinda hate but its his time to release his stress and the fact that he always let me be infront of my laptop.

*Oh ya..he bought me mini laptop for my birthday..TQ laling..

About yesterday.. We went to Tesco Shah Alam so that I can meet this someone for something, and the thing is as important as other thing. So we went there, with the thought in mind that we wanted to let the kids also play around at the playground.

We finally decide to go home at nearly 11 pm and most of the shop there is closing and they had their day. But then I noticed this one shop selling woman blouse for RM20. yes doploh ringgit saje...

So I looked at papa in the eyes and said, "boleh pa?"

papa said, "boleh.." and he smile and begin to pick this one blouse. "Ni lawa pakai santai2 la mcm gi PD gitu.." I like them...

Then I said "can i pick 2 pieces?"

Papa angguk n smile .. (the fact that he carried Rayyan, kepung kakak n Azalea jgn gi jauh, dengan tangan sebelah lagi pegang bungkusan air) but still smiling. Tau papa excited gak. Maybe lama I didnt buy clothes for myself.. ;-P

Mama pilih dua helai saiz 44.. READ.. 44

Then budak yang jaga tu tanya (sgt peramah org nyer),"akak saiz berapa biasa pakai?"

"Ni saiz 44 kak, akak nih saiz 40, 42 gitu dah okey" sambil mengacukan baju ke badan mama.

"Dik, 44 la sebab dada nih....." pastu dia pon...

"Yer lah kak 44 la baru muat"

"kan dah kata.." , mama senyum

And today that's make me thinking, nape la tak jaga makan ya? sebab breastfeeding? Lapo..haha...I gained dlm 4-5 kg lately. *sigh*

Dulu berat masa mula kenal papa is 42 kg only, masa form 4.. Now...hmmm.. make me think, yesterday was really another story

*psstt...papa also gain some weight.. Told you, papa ngan mama mesti naik berat sama and his been complaining.. ever since --> Read here

For ... I AM A TIGER... (Rayyan Turns One Year and 2 Months)

2009-04-02T01:12:00.000-07:00

I cant help but love this picture very much...

TiGeR.... we kept calling Rayyan 'Tiger' ... (kakak la mula dulu), dr mlm sebelum tidur sampai la pagi nak hantar Rayyan ke nursery..

Aummmm.....

Presenting to you ---> Tiger confused..
*pelik kot sebab mama jarang ambil gambar..hahah

"kakak, nape kena angkat tangan??"...

"angkat jek tangan, mama nk amik gambar tuh, bukan selalu mama amik gambar.." hahah..

Sayang gambar nih blur skit.... My 3 heart n soul...

Penat posing...

Adik kakak... Dina yang abis ati dgn Rayyan..
Soalan lazim "Mama, bila mama nk beranak lagi..?" huhuuu

For Rayyan Turns One....

2009-01-29T14:59:00.000-08:00

There's few friends keep asking for Rayyan picture... So this post, nak penuhkan dgn Rayyan pic since the day he was borne sampai today... insyaAllah... (this will be post-dated post, but I wanna put them as 29 JANUARY 2009, Rayyan is One years old, meaning that I have breastfeed him for whole one year, syukur ya Allah...)Alhamdulilllah...

ON the day he was borned.. Alhamdulillah sihat je 2.88 kg.. Lahir jek terus bukak mata.. Mama masuk labor room jam 9.15, dekat jam 10 dah keluar...jam 10.30 mama masuk wad

Dalam pangkuan mama... muka manja...ekekke

masa kena jaundis..teruk, sampai masuk NICU

bawah sinaran UV...siann..huhuuukkk

Botakkan rambut.... lepas tuh majlis berbuai

Ngantuk sgt lepas kena cukur rambut and mandi...tido jap. Satu2nyer anak mama yang tido mata rapat...

Berbuai dgn Syahmi, yang tua 4 bulan

Hehehe...org kata comey lak dia lepas botak
(gambar nih mama buat wallpaper kat komputer, tepi tuh ayat surah Al-Baqarah ayat-60, utk banyakkan susu badan...masa Azalea mama selalu baca doa tuh. Masa Rayyan mama baca masa pregnant. Alhamdulillah..)

Rayyan dh boleh duduk...duk dlm bumboo seat... Rambut tumbuh halus jek

Kuat nyusu and bergayut...syukur

Gigi tumbuh masa 7 bulan lebih..masa gambar nih dh 10-11 bulan..hehe..kuat mengigit

Hero..

For It's My Messy Workplace... TAG part II

2009-01-27T04:11:00.000-08:00

Errkkk....Someone tagged me again... ni ha Kakakku sayang ..Haha actually, tag nih lama jugak terperam, around 5 weeks. Seriously, tgh tak boleh tido nih, might as well do this tagged. Plus, I finished blog-hopping, so you know how its feels after like browsing thru other people blog and see the colorful stories of other people life, then you come back to your blog...only to realised. HAAAA....tak update..update juga..kuikuikui... The plus point to update my blog is, hmmm...ada beberapa org baik hati, letak blog ini dlm blogroll mereka. Maka, sedar la diri ini bahawa blog sendiri sudah 5 minggu x hapdet... But I have very valid reason also. HINT: see previous entry

okey...Dina, Azalea, Rayyan... Ni tempat kerja Mama...

Pandangan dari pintu masuk...
Kebetulan masa ambil gambar ni, baru pusing meja tuh mengadap ke arah ezan, kalau tidak laptop tu, mengadap dinding sebelah pintu. Bila ezan tanya, kenapa ubah meja? Jawapan, dah bosan 3 tahun menghadap dinding...And satu meja kosong, kot-kot student datang untuk bicara

Pandangan dari sebelah dalam...
Tapi tempat kerjaku memang dr dulu tak bisa kemas..

Pandangan hadapan dari tempat ezan, my officemate..

Meja ketiga yang tiada bertuan, kami longgokan file utk Lawatan MQA..

Meja officemate, Ezan..walau camne giler busy ...dia akan kemas sebelum balik...
*I always imagine myself as Ezan and I think I can go beserk ada roomate macam diriku yang..hmmm.. sesekali mengemas??

Tempat kami solat, berdua sahaja dengan ezan...sometimes tempat nap juga..hehe..nampak cozy kan? Adakah nampak tenang sebab ia tempat solat atau tenang sebab ia tempat nap???

Tambah skit entry nih...koridor menuju ke bilik ;)

Pintu depan bilik...

Sekian...

For .....finally....

2009-01-21T13:03:00.000-08:00

.
..
....
.....and there is a saying...that 'a picture is worth thousand words'

so...I need not tell the story rite? ;)

For Change Will Do You Good? ..

2008-12-23T03:52:00.000-08:00

'The Change We Need' kata campaign Mr. Barrack Obama. Just now while I lay down and breastfeed Rayyan, something came across my mind. Change... again kata campaign Mr.Obama 'Change Can Happen'. Teringat blog nih... sgt simple, sangat tak de ape2 lah pendekata nyer. But I love my blog dearly, for me that's the utmost important thing (sape tak sayang blog wehh...). I created the blog at first solely as I need a place to pour thought, to put in 'canvas' what I have in mind. There's time when I just sat and look blankly at my blog layout. The thought of changing the layout does come and go, sesekali mcm angin menderu gitu. But then I think, hmmm....like my brother motto 'Let It Be'.. So terbatal la niat nk wat layout lawa2.. Nak tukar gambar Dina and Azalea kat atas tu pon mcm terbantut.

Atau, adakah I'm the type of person who has a very hard time to change? setia? tak pasti. But then when I did blog hopping.. terlintas juga perkara yang sama. Tukar layout? Its like 'To Be or Not to Be' matters. Its like you have a house, and was thinking. Mau cat baru ke tak mau.. Not that I am that lazy to do it. Tapi hati terasa sangat berat. And I was thinking, if I change the layout..because I wanted to change them or because I wanted to let the other blogger 'cuci mata' with the whole new layout? Then, terus lagi rasa tak nak tukar layout, sebab dulu mula2 buat blog untuk diri sendiri. Tak bagitahu org pon ada blog..hehe.. Even papa pun tak tahu, then only find out coz I leave the browser idle.

Actually there's a lot of things in life that I found hard for me to change. My habit for example, suka tangguh kerja. So jadi delayed... pastu kalau org paksa2. Lagi rasa malas nk buat, the more people push me..the more delayed the task. Everything will be 'in progress'. Tapi kalau org x push, pandai lak siap..huhuu...
And I'm married to the same type of person, so memang tunggang-langgang hidup kami. But guess what, I love my life. Even my dear friend Ezni tanyer, 'Tak mo fly ke? belajar oversea pulak?', jawapan no 1 : mmg tak layak rasanyer. Jawapan no 2 : rasa sayang dengan kehidupan sekarang. And if possible, I wanted to stay like this. Tapi mana mungkin kan?

Teringat my very bestfriend Ijah, back then in high school, (kat Malaysia its secondary school laa...pandai jek taruk high school ;p). Masa tu gaduh2 dengan sorg schoolmate nih, she accused me of something. Ijah menjadi peneman setia, we went to meet her. And I explained to her my arguement when then she suddenly said 'kau dah banyak berubah'... And out of blue, I said 'we have to change to face life'. Habis jek sesi buli org tu...oppsss sessi 'slowtalk' tuh. Ijah ckp ' Ja, aku suka la..betullah "we have to change to face life" kan?'..

Err...I think I have to postponed this entry.... haha

For I Always Have Reason

2008-12-21T23:08:00.000-08:00

Last friday, like the usual...my workplace sunyi. But I guess, my heart has never been. Even on the day like that (usually Friday) on the way to work I already know, not many collegues will be around... There nothing makes me feel lonely. Maybe bcos I'm sooo used to the fact that most will take day off on Friday. My office is 'cowboy town' on Friday.Memang begini sejak kami pindah dr Shah Alam ke sini..
*depa nih sungguh banyak cuti utk dihabiskan

I signed in my Skype, also to find fews only available. And upon my availability, Dora skype me, and we chat for awhile, and we end up exchange our blog address. *we have exchange before tapi then I lost hers and she lost mine... But what make me write this entry is Dora's entry here. The fact that both of us use english in our blog. Dora fully used english as medium in her blog, while I did use some english but ku rojakkan dgn bahasa melayu.But almost 75% entry in my blog is english.

Why I prefer english... Actually its not my preference, but...its due to the fact that I need to teach sciences in english. And the fact that english was supposed to be the medium in writing, speaking and everything here. I love bahasa melayu. senang kan, bahasa ibunda. But then I need to improve my english. Some people said 'ok la...i do think your english is good'.. Uhhh?? I always think my english is not so good. I have grammatical error here and there. I even usually started my class with english and end up speaking n lecturing in malay. Apa nak jadi?

So i need to improve myself kan? see how i mixed every sentences with malay words/sentences...??

That's the main reason I used english here, use english when talking to Dora n Meg,use english in meeting, even meeting tuh conduct in Malay. I really need to improve my english...harus..harus...huhuuuu

For I've Been Tagged

2008-12-02T22:18:00.000-08:00

I’ve been tagged! by eversweet Ira atau Cloud9 ;)

Rules:

1. The rules of the game get posted at the beginning
2. Each player answers the questions about themselves
3. At the end of the post the player then tags 5 people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves a comment, letting them know they got tagged and to ask them to play and read your blog

Starting time : 3.50 am (baru terjaga dr tido..tgh demam nih..uhukss)
Name : @ home - Aja, @ office - Naza (BEST)
Sisters : adik ku,Eitah yang jiwalara cam kakak dia.. (tp jiwa lara dia lg teruks dr aku)
Brothers : 3 big bro, 2 bro, 1 in memory (died on motor accident, and he is always in our heart..al-Fatihah)
Shoe size : 6,7 kalau preggy up to 8..pastu turn balik 6..kuang3x
Height : 158cm (sometimes I do feel I'm taller..ngeh..ngeh..ngeh)
Where do you live : PUNCAK ALAM, papa kata..papa kawen dgn org 'keramat' so mmg kena duduk kat puncak alam (sesuai dgn status sebagai org 'keramat'..ye lah tuuu)

Have you ever been on a plane : Yep, tp bukan gi obersea, gi sarawak jek..
Swam in the ocean : Really loved it! <--ni jwpn cloud tp sebab sama..biarkan ya?
Fallen asleep at school : I slept during class in secondary school, gua budak Asrama, mmg kuat tido kot, and always fallen asleep during degree year. Pastu sekarang lecture kat IPT, takkan aku nk marah student tido..hmmpphhhh
Broken someone’s heart : Yep.. selagi belom kawin, ada jek ati terluka. Bukan comel sgt pon gua nih, tp papa kata mmg sebelum mengandung shomel la..tp dh tuu...huwaaaaa..x sanggup ckp ooo

Fell off your chair : Mcm x penah jek, tp ada dua tiga kali tgh2 jalan tergelincir, clumsy? kalau iyer..patut la Dina tuh clumsy...

Sat by the phone all night waiting for someone to call : I have a husband who has becomes my ex-boyfren (ye lah dh jd hubby, so x-boyfren la kan) and since I know him, he hates calling or talk over phone. So YES, most of the time I sat by phone all nite n waiting for his call, atau letak h/p sebelah bantal, kejap2 check..painful nyer masa tu.Yang bengang 'tahap 3' tuh, dia yang nak sgt kat gua, pastu dh dpt malas2 call lak. Tp bukan malas call aku jek, parents dia pon dia malas call..huhuu

Saved e-mails : Yep.. I’m so consistent! and usually its hard for me to delete emails.

What is your room like : Bedroom - ok la..so so jek, kalau dtg umah aku, simple je x de brg2 pon, cam umah sewa, Office - Messy!...definitely. Then every end of semester baru kemas. Kalau tidak, nk carik paper jek sepah balik. Huhuuu

What’s right beside you: 2 handphones, mine n papa's

What is the last thing you ate : Tgh demam tp order kat papa, satay 15 cucuks..pastu papa belikan Char Kuew Tiow lak..selera lak tuh (papa kata. biar betul mama demam???!!)

Ever had…
Chicken pox : Yep.. long time ago..
Sore throat : Yes...rite now, and because of the sore throat..tu yg demam tuu
Stitches :I dont have any...yet
Broken nose : Nop!
Do you Believe in love at first sight : yup...I believe in anything regarding love..
Like picnics : Nope...memenatkan, dan mengusutkan rambut..(walau ku bertudung ya..)

Who was/were…
The last person you danced with : My hubby and with the 3 of our kids, memula kami berdua, then Rayyan mintak dukung, pastu Dina n Azalea gelak2 sambil menyelit celah kaki..
You last yelled at : dont remember, rasa cam lama x jerit kat org..

Today did you...
Talk to someone you like : yup
Kissed anyone : papa kissed me and said, cepat sihat ya
Talk to an ex : NEVER!
Miss someone : Arwah adik, and most of the people that crossed my life path

Who do you really hate: ada...back-stabber..

Do you like your hand-writing : yup..

Are your toe nails painted : NEVER!

Whose bed other than yours would you rather sleep in : not sure
What color shirt are you wearing now : Cream + black + brown stripes
Are you a friendly person : hehe...yes I guess, tp ramai kata garangs
Do you have any pets : not for the time being, masa kecik dulu suka kucing
Do you sleep with the TV on : Yes.. sometimes
What are you doing right now : checking emails n my stores..
Can you handle the truth : well it depends, coz truth is painful, sometimes

Are you closer to your mother or father : Both of them

Do you eat healthy : huhuhu.. not all the time..

Do you still have pictures of you & your ex : ada...mana ntah, tapi sebab been with papa since 8 years before getting married so x de sgt la gambo2 tuh

If you’re having a bad day, who are you most likely to go to : Papa

Are you loud or quiet most of the time : Loud most of the time..
Are you confident : Not really but I do get helps to build them

5 things I was doing 10 years ago
1) I was studying in UKM
2) actively participate in kamsis event
3) In love with papa
4) I sometimes travel home to Keramat kalau bosan kat kampus
5) I was active and vibrant back then

5 things I would do if I were a billionaire
1) settle my debts
2) perform hajj/umrah
3) buy a beautiful house for my parents
4) buy the ever great Medela Freestyle Breastpump for every breastfeedingmoms
5) build a charity school with conducive facilities <--me tooo cloud..

5 of my bad habits
1) suka bercakap tp bgtahu subjek last sekali (mangsa: papa n ezan..hahah)
2) shoppings for unnecessary
3) take time to perform solat
4) malas masak, tp suka kemas ---but sejak sakit, umah cam tongkang pechah
5) pending my office tasks ---me tooo cloud, argghhhh..

5 places I lived before
1) Keramat, KL
2) UKM, Bangi
3) Dengkil (Jenderam Hilir)
4) Subang Permai
5) Puncak Alam

5 people I tag

Huwaaa... tatau nk tag sape laa...nanti pk dulu

For Rayyan Has This Antics...phewwww

2008-11-22T10:10:00.000-08:00

I hardly post anything about me being a breastfeedingmom. I usually keep it around my cycle only. And once in a while if someone asked, I will politely explain about me being workingmom, breastfeeding n pumping at work. But tonight I do think I wanted to blog about this. Its Rayyan..and his antics while breastfeeding...

Since last week, specifically 5 days ago. I noticed Rayyan being sleepy early in the evening. So he will sleep for a while around 8-9pm. I usually come home and directly breastfeed him for no matter how long. And papa being understanding is going to take care of everything while my nursing moment with Rayyan takes place. Usually undisturb. And Rayyan was able to empty both breast since he is 8 months.

And after dinner, he will play around until he is tired and needed to be changed in clean clothes and diaper, usually around 10.30pm. And I will take him to bed, leaving Dina n Azalea with papa. And its either I then leave him to sleep alone (usually this will failed miserably) or I will somehow sleep with him. As the semester has ended, and probably because I have no class, no workload, and not devastatingly tired. I didn't fall asleep with him..

...and now what happen since 5 days ago n just now. Rayyan will wake up, crying like being bitten by something. And he DIDN't want to breastfeed. OMG... whenever I tried to breastfeed him during this time, he will try as much to pull away from me and crying like mad. The first night I thought he was having this colic,stomachache maybe..but putting some ointment on his stomach doesn't relieved him. So I gave him to papa...guess what? He stop crying...

Apa lah...anak jantan mama nih...aiyoo.. Then the next day it happen again and I starts to think that he is fed up that my milk is not enough. I was thinking maybe I should pump earlier than 6pm so that by the time I reach home, my breast will be full again. I keep telling myself, susu aku banyak...susu aku banyak.. And I dont think this is the problem. But curiosity did make me wonder. Sungguh pelik. Nowadays I still managed to pump around 17 oz - 23 oz per day (depends on how many session per day).

And then just now, this happen again. He's fast asleep. And I took the opportunity to surf the net. When I heard him crying, I went to breastfeed him..And he REFUSED!!!.. Even I tried so bad, pun x mo jugak. Pastu baru la...mama perasan. Dia bukan suck then lepas like x puashati. He even wont let the nipple inside his mouth..mata pon pejam x pandang mama pon.For the past 5 days, kalau jd camni mama kejut papa, coz he really mcm nk meronta2 lepas dr mama. And bila papa dukung Rayyan tangkap lentok kat papa, pastu pejam mata.But just now, sian sgt nk kejut papa. so I took him out of the room, bg dia duduk...tepuk2 belakang Rayyan...then dukung pelan2 enjut2 (x leh buat sgt camni still terasa backache). Last2 mama let Rayyan sat on my lap. Mata dia segar balik, I let him look around. Lama skit.. he starts to feel sleepy again, and I take him to bed.

So...Let me guess :

Number 1 Rayyan is having nightmare??

Number 2 Mama busyuk sgt ker? Sampai refused mama dlm mimpi??....

-
-

Alahai anak jantan mama..agak2 ape org lain pikir ya?

For It's For Cancer Awareness

2008-11-22T09:42:00.000-08:00

Thanks wawi for sharing this tag with me!
And to all my fellow bloggers who read this message, please feel free to grab this tag, help spreading the breast cancer awareness. Thank you!
This one is all about breast cancer, which everyone knows is one of the most life-threatening diseases today. I’m doing my part in spreading awareness on breast cancer by sharing some scary yet so very true facts on breast cancer. Ladies, do take note!

* One in eight women or 12.6% of all women will get breast cancer in her lifetime.

* Breast cancer risk increases with age and every woman is at risk.

* Every 13 minutes a woman dies of breast cancer.

* Seventy-seven percent of women with breast cancer are over 50.

* Breast cancer is the leading cause of cancer death in women between the ages of 15 and 54, and the second cause of cancer death in women 55 to 74.

* Risks for breast cancer include a family history, atypical hyperplasia, early menstruation (before age 12), late menopause (after age 55), current use or use in the last ten years of oral contraceptives, and daily consumption of alcohol.

* Early detection of breast cancer, through monthly breast self-exam and particularly yearly mammography after age 40, offers the best chance for survival.

Above facts taken from Women’s Health Organisation Forum.

And now here is the tag and the rules:
1. Put the logo in your blog.
2. Add a link to the person who shared it with you.
3. Nominate at least 7 other blogs
4. Leave a message for your nominee on their blog.

Now I'm tagging any women who read my blog and really concern in helping spreading the awareness..who knows it might save other women's life by early detection and prevention..

InsyaAllah..

For We Have A Plan, but God Has Bigger Plans

2008-11-13T18:59:00.000-08:00

How do I start this, I know if I didn't start pouring this, I somehow might lost this in the middle of My life.

It was a months a go, in a middle of Hari Raya month. I was all set. I informed papa that I wanted so much to attend the gathering or open house whoever invited. No matter who. Asal org jemput je..nak jugak pegi. Papa kata OK, as long as it doesnot clash with family interest. And that weekend I was supposed to attend open house at Ayin's. I promised her.. and CikWawi and Mitu..

The open house is on Sunday, on Saturday I planned a date with papa. I love dating him. So much... All went well except I didnt get to buy what I want, and Kak Linda called to come to our house plus I had this bad feelings that my menstrual period will come..uh uh.. And I planned to call kak Ina once I got home. Mau tanyer kak Ina, mmg sakit perut n sakit belakang ka kalau nk period after months not having one due to bfeeding activities. Sampai jer rumah..Amik anak, I told papa I wanted to sleep. Penat.

And I woke up later...only to find that I couldn't get up. It is so painful.. my back..I was in pain. I didnt cry, but I was so shocked. "Papa, nape dgn mama ni?", papa pun terkejut. He tried to pull me up. But to no avail. "tak leh papa, sakit sgt nih". Ok try duduk.... Lagi sakit. I end up baring balik. Papa said do not move. "mama rase sakit mcm dulu?"... "Gosh...this is more painful than before!"..

Peminat Kopi Cilik - Episode 2

2008-10-05T23:08:00.000-07:00

Bosan giler kat office hari nih...datang keje pon x de semangat langsung. Lambat..sgt lambat dtg hari nih. Jam 10.20 baru sampai, jenuh la nk cover lagi 2 jam tu. Biasa around 9 atau 9.30 am tuh dah sampai kat opis. So balik around 6 atau 6.30 pm. Walau x de semangat dtg keje, tapi otak tuh duk berkira2 jugak nk buat itu ini. Last2 sampai la nih x buat ape2. Rindu sgt kat anak2.. Rinduuu...huwaaaa... Mama rindu la. Dah 9 hari duk jaga diorang...

Tempek kejap gambo anak2 mama.. Kakak n Rayyan... Kakak n Azalea sayang sgt Rayyan. Dina kalau boleh tak nak kongsi Rayyan dgn Azalea. Siap mintak mama beranak lagi utk bg Azalea adik. Rayyan kakak punyer. Tapi ada sekali tuh kakak kata 'Mama, beranak adik girl lagi kat kakak, kakak x nk kongsi Rayyan dgn Azalea. Bg Rayyan kat Azalea!!'. Kata2 anak kecil, ingat Rayyan tuh mainan ke sukati jek nk kongsi, x mo kongsi??

My Dina n Rayyan - Comel kan gambar nih? Ibu aka mak su nyer amik kan...

My Azalea - Gambar blur, suka sgt bergerak time mama nk amik gambo. Dah ler kamera hphone je..

Cerita psl Peminat Kopi Cilik - Episode 2

Kebelakangan nih (almost 3 mos now, mama suka sgt Neslo Ais) Sejak abis pantang mama 100 hari plus sehingga 6 months tak minum ais, Mama crave sgt dengan Neslo Ais. Sebab tu agaknyer berat ku turun slow sgt..hmm..

Hari tuh kami dlm perjalanan balik Keramat, papa ckp kat kakak.

"Kejap yer kakak, kita berenti beli Neslo utk mama"

"Mama nih...(kakak bersungut...dengan muka berkerut), tak payah la..nanti lambat sampai umah nenek!!"

Papa memancing kakak " Ala kejap je...dlm Neslo ada nescafe tau.."

"oooo...OK. Papa beli la Neslo kat mama.." Kakak sengih lebar

Aha..Memang at the end, dia yang minum lebih..

hmmm...

note: Bace psl Peminat Kopi Cilik - Episode 1

For This Has Been Long Left

2008-09-23T12:20:00.000-07:00

I miss this. I missed my blogging world. Even I'm not a good blogger though. But I love my blog. Love it so much. Love pouring thoughts I guess. I have many thoughts. Why? Imagine I drive to work for 42 minutes, and back again 42 minutes. What should I do then? Just listen to the music? So what I did, I always think.. daydreams.. planning... whatever I can do behind the wheels.. If its not fasting month, I will even eat while driving. I even do pumping while driving ...

I will update this blog again.Especially now I have few blogger/cyber friends around. The sgt baik hati and sooo sweet kak ina, great limau_nipis, eversweet n caring bib and zea, a very humble eija, strict but caring kuacibunge, the sweet n nice cloud, the blur but cheerful erleyna..that's few to name. Will link them to this blog later. Oh ya..I met new friends in breastfeeding cycle, namely zue and ariys, and we've been sharing a lot lately and it has been great.

I missed my chat with Megh, I didn't fullfill my promised to esma to upload Rayyan picture here. I 'hutang' kak Ina one entries for blog. Hutang Limau for my breastfeeding chronology. I'll make up to them. I will n I must. And I love you guys..all of you. Thanks for being with me all this time. Thanks for supporting me..

Love...

Note : Yey.. Ezan dah balik study. Eventually becomes a listener to my fret n whine n fret n whine.. Sabiah dah beli kereta (ini mesti mau tulis sini, kasi highlite, lama ooo...dia tunggu kereta itu), Hana kecik now Lab Manager (hambik..boss baru punyer penangan)..ekekekke... Kak Fred and Meggie sambung phD, sila..sila...sila Permanentkan Head Damaged anda (sorry tak mo join..eheheh..LOL)

Note under note : InsyaAllah after Raya..my Long Delayed Work will end. Doakan Berjaya ..Aminn

For The Pains That Merely Subsided

2008-01-27T19:20:00.000-08:00

It has been so long since I last post anything on my blog. Last time nak update pasal hari raya with kakak and Azalea. But tak terbuat, busy and tak de mood sangat.

Pastu, just when I have mood to update my blog. Modem broadband yang beli mahal gilos tuh, siap dgn wireless bagai kena sambar petir before Awal Muharam. Aduuuhhh… Then papa sibuk pulak nak unsubscribe streamyx. Sebab nanti 2 bulan pantang maybe tak guna langsung streamyx sebab pantang umah nenek. Mama pun dah submit ‘my long delayed work’. So streamyx use tak kritikal sangat. Lagipun mama macam teringin wireless broadband…ehehehhe…

Sekarang ni pulak tgh MC kat umah. So papa belikan mama new broadband modem start mama MC hari tuh. Unfortunately, (kali ni betul-betul salah mama), kena sambar petir lagi.. Nasib la masa kejadian, laptop Dell tuh tak effect sangat. Just LAN connection tak leh guna dah langsung. Huuuhuuu…padan muka mama. Tu la…Alpa lagi. Tapi papa dah pergi jumpa dealer tuh, sebab warranty inclusive damaged by lightning. Harap2 hari ni dapat la tukar..

Oh ya..I’m on MC due to pain in my joint. Kat pangkal peha. The pain is soooo unbearable. Imagine this:

1) Lie down on your back. Straighten your leg. Then try to pull your knee up. Well right now I can’t even do that…huwaaa…

2) Lie down on your back. Then try pulling yourself to right or left side. Again…right now I can’t do that. If I lie down, then I have to bear for hours sleeping on my back. If I need to turn to left or right side. It’s either with helps from others or I have to bear the pains and turn side..

3) I still can drive at the moment. But imagine this. In order to get in car, I need to sit on driver seat (or passenger seat). Then using my hand, I have to pull my own leg up to sit nicely in car. Nak turun dari kereta jangan cakap la…uwaaaaa..

Tak pe la…terima jek ujian Allah nih. Maybe nak kifarah dosa-dosaku yang lalu. Mana tau bersalin sok senang kan. Right now dah banyak kali false alarm atau false contraction. Dua hari lepas asyik mengeras jek baby dalam ni, dan sakit pinggang mcm dah tiba masa. Atuk (my dad) siap kata, pegi jek la serah diri kat HUKM tuh. Tapi tanda tak turun lagi. Tak mau la pegi, kang kena check memacam lagi. Tak best…uhuksss

I did go to tukang urut to help subsided the pain. Alhamdulillah mmg subside sikit. Still sakit but boleh la tahan. But then when I started to do housework or anything related to movement. Lama kelamaan.. sakit tuh datang balik. And now.. mmg tak tertahan la..

As for the baby inside, Alhamdulillah last Tuesday, gynae kata semua OK. Harap2 OK la sampai bersalin dan selepas melahirkan. But then judging from papa’s look n eyes, I know he was hoping I’ll give birth earlier as he can’t bear to see the pain I’m going through. Don’t worry papa, you have been so much helped!! Almost 80% of childcare and housework papa buat since we knew I’m pregnant. What else yang mama nak papa tolong. Nothing. Just be by my side like you always do. Love...

For I Pray That You'll Have A Baby... or Another Baby... Perhaps

2007-10-09T19:54:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, I finally met her during the break fast occasion. She looks healthy but thin and pale. I have the urge to go and talk to her. But I waited until we finished eating, eventually she came to our table and we chatted. She is my husband colleague, and quite close to me (considering we’ve known each other since the company started with 10 employees). When she talks she sometimes quietly looks down at my tummy. And last night she told me all about what happen 6 weeks ago...

Yes, six weeks ago Reena lost her baby. Her pregnancy and mine is actually same in terms. Reena was supposed to deliver her baby on 11th February and my EDD on 8th February 2008. We last met when we’re 10 weeks pregnant, and she looks fine. Later my husband told me Reena was admitted to hospital few times due to dehydration. And during her 18 weeks of pregnancy her bleeding became worst...and the doctor advised her to ‘let go’ the baby. Because it’s either harmful to her or the baby. And she had to force abortion (miscarriage) her baby.

I am sad for her, first time my hubby told me about it. I was shaking; I couldn’t even think to say anything. (memula marah gak kat papa, tgh2 beli makanan kat pasar malam bgtahu news camtu. Terus tak lalu nk beli apa-apa. Nak jalan pun rasa tak larat).

Other than sadness I felt for Reena, most my concern is that she has waited for 4 years for the baby. Reena already has a boy named Harish, who is cheeky and smart. Reena told me Harish cried when he saw his lifeless sister. The baby borne physically complete. You can see her well formed gender, ear, hand and everything. In fact she still alive for few minutes after she was borne.

I have a few other friends and relatives like Reena. Who has waited for like years to conceive another baby, who has never yet has a baby, having trouble conceiving and all the difficulties. I am sad for them but I can’t say I understand how they felt. I have never been in their shoes. I could never tell them ‘I understand how you feel’. But I sincere has my sympathy for them, and if I have a way to help. I hope I can help.

Two months ago, Ezy ..my best friend cried over the phone. I tried to console her and tell her that at least she already has a child. Aqil Fathi was borne a year before Dina. And since then Ezy has been waiting to get pregnant again. But to no avail. Trying to console her is like pushing the wrong button. She cried telling me how Aqil constantly asked for a baby sister or brother. Aqil is going to be five next year. Ezy feels like she’s been waiting like forever. Yes, she did go for homeopathy treatment, and is planning to meet a gynae. And again, I pushed a wrong button when I said at least you have Aqil. Ezy told me that’s what everyone been trying to tell her. But she feels down, especially when other relatives accuse her of trying not to get pregnant, they even accuse her of taking contraceptive, and some even cruelly said she’s infertile.

How could they.. I just don’t understand how some people can be so cruel, so harsh towards other human being. And I just don’t understand how some people can ask question like, for example ‘ when are you going to have baby?’ ..’when are you going to have another baby?’ .. ‘when are you going to get married?’. All these question for me is totally irrelevant. Aren’t those are things that only God knows? How come you know an answer to the question that only God know the answers. Human can only planned, hope n pray, worked hard…wait n see. Sometimes I just felt that you should ask this type of people,this question.. ‘Do you know when you’re going to die?’

And I have a long list of friend who has problem conceiving. My bestfriend, a colleague, my cousins, my sister in law, my long-time-no-see friend and the list go on. Usually when I met them and I see no changes, or I noticed that they come to occasion with husband only. I don’t dare ask. But I have to admit, for a few close friend, colleague, sister in law (who has never mind sharing how she felt about the whole situation) .. I did sometimes ask them politely, just to see if I can be a help. I just hope they don’t mind, it’s just that I care. And I pray for them…InsyaAllah..the baby will come along somehow.

Note : Last night when papa asked me what Reena n I chatted about, I took the opportunity to say this to papa. ‘tengok la betapa susah nya org nak dapatkan zuriat, dan tuhan bg kita semudah-mudahnya dapat zuriat. Mama harap sedikit susah payah, tak de duit belanja, ujian-ujian lain tu, kita tak yah la mengeluh…’ . I do believe everyone has their fair share of difficulties in life. Wallahuaklam..

For The Little Girl That Starts to Talk

2007-09-26T22:50:00.000-07:00

27 September 2007
This morning Azalea wakes up early than both mama n papa. She plays around alone. I noticed this few weeks she starts to bubbly talk all day.

Then to our amazement, when papa wants to lift her up, papa asked Azalea..

‘Azalea, nak mandi dengan papa takkk..??’

Suddenly she opens her arms and said,

‘Papa Ajalea..’ and she smile so bright that our hearts also smile..

Terkejutnya mama, you go girl!!

Yes, she already can says few words like,

‘Nak, mama, papa, atuk, ibu (her mak su), opah, bak, ambik, kakak (sometimes it sounded like tatak), bear, pampers, susu, yak, mandi, ataih…’

And usually when she does bubbly talks, we will talk to her straight. We learn by not following her bubbly talks she will talk fast. InsyaAllah. And this morning she proves she can talk. Alhamdulillah.

Kakak talks quite early also. Kakak first sentence also early in the morning when she woke up from long night sleeps. Her first sentence was,

‘ Tu susu Dina..’

Ok..I admit I did overreacted when kakak first talk. I smsed my family and few close friends about it. I jumped in joy. That time my reaction was like ‘ yeahh…my baby finally talks’. Well, now.. Kakak talks non-stop unless when watching TV. Ahahha..kena la mama layan.

But kakak did set high benchmarks in her milestones. Maybe it’s going to be hard for her siblings to follow. But Luckily, I always believe that every child has their own milestones. InsyaAllah.

For The Check Up That Doesn't Cost Us A Fortune

2007-09-25T14:35:00.000-07:00

About a week ago, I went for a check up with Prof Za at UKMSC. The check up is due for once every two months. Other than that I went for check up at local government Klinik Desa.

Upon knowing the gender of our third baby, the only thing that was in my mind is to get pregnant for the fourth time.

Papa was of course surprised and asked me why?.. The only reason I could think is that, Azalea n Dina can be a team, so our third baby need a gang also so he can make a team of his own. Papa just smiles and tell me not to worry, coz we have another 3 quota to fulfill. Uhh…come to think about it, I pray to Allah we can take a good care of all our babies.

The gynae gave us 5 printed ultrasound of our baby, of which we only recognized the head, other than that… mama pon tak tahu ape doctor print. It’s normal scan. I did request for detail scan which is 4D, but then I have to go to HUKM on Friday. Tak larat la pulak nak mengulang. And papa also doesn’t seem so interested, so I have to cancel.

This first scan, shows the size of baby head, and prof. Za did measure the size of cerebrum and cerebellum. Normal she said..
This second n third scan is confusing, this is actually the baby face yawning. But even I stress my eyes I couldn’t figure it out. But during the scan we did see the baby fingers open n closed, and he’s moving his hand to cover his face, he opened his mouth to swallow amniotic fluid… he is so active..
And last, but not least. The gender… Nampak jek this appears on the screen prof Za terus sebut gender baby… And she said Alhamdulillah several times and congratulates us. We..don’t care about the baby gender at first,as long as the baby is healthy and in good condition.. But when my MIL smsed me telling how happy she is to know I'm carrying baby BOY. My heart suddenly flips.. Yes, It’s A BOY based on the ultrasound

Note : when I told Sabiah (a colleague of mine) that maybe I should get pregnant for the fourth time. All she said was ‘ Akak nih, kalau lagi sekali girl camne? Tak de geng jugak.’ Ala…Sa nih, suka tau buat akak berpikir balik. Org dah planned baik punyer.

Note under note : I was charge about rm132 for the check up.
But I do think its worth it compared to going to other gynae.
Here’s the portion :

Consultation : RM 25 (for a specialist that is a professor, its cheap)
Ultrasound : RM 55 (for 5 printed pages, it’s worth it)
Vitamins : RM 24 (supply of obimin n calcium for 2 months)
Disposable : RM 14 (for urine test, blood test)
Lab : RM 14 (for urine, full blood count, BP n weight)

Before I know UKMSC I simply went to any gynae. Usually gynae charge is RM 50 and above. And for ultrasound only will cost around RM30 (with one printed page or no print at all). That’s why I said it’s worth it.

My Third Pregnancy

2007-09-17T15:28:00.000-07:00

20 AUGUST 2007

Stay, stay, baby,
Stay safe in mama’s womb
Time will come soon
You’ll be out to this beautiful world
And you’ll still be safe in mama’s arms

I planned to dedicate this third entry for my little baby, my third baby. ‘Baby satu’ kata Kakak. Kakak is so excited about this whole new baby thing. She even talks to the baby frequently. And Kakak n Azalea endlessly kissed my stomach at every single chance they got. Azalea for instance, can’t let me lie down. She will selak my baju, saw my stomach n definitely kissed it. I guess she just followed what Kakak did.

17 Sept 2007

It has been long since I last postponed posting this entry. Actually I planned to scan the baby picture from ultrasound, so I need papa to scan and save it using office scanner. Tapi asyik lupe jek. At last I managed to get the pic post here using my handphone. So here’s the baby…..

At 10 weeks.. My baby look tiny, about 27 mm..

This Wednesday, I’ll accompany papa for his appointment at PPUM, then on the afternoon he’ll accompany me to UKMSC (UKM Specialist Centre) at HUKM, for my appointment with my gynae. Suka2 jek mama pilih gynae sebab pakai GL company. Eheheh…Just to give the best to my baby. Gynae nih nama Prof Dr Zaleha. Masa beliau sambut Azalea dulu, she’s Prof Madya. Now, she’s professor already. Monthly mama checkup kat Klinik Desa Kerajaan jek.

Another thing is that, lucky me that my company has budget for medical up to RM3000. So boleh la mama guna untuk bersalin normal. Sebenarnya sakit bersalin tu sama jek kat memana pun tapi mama nak lepas bersalin tu duduk bilik seorang. Nak rehat. Kalau ikut gaji mama n papa..tak mampu kot. Masa mama bersalin kan Dina kat hospital Putrajaya, I got room with 4 patients. Malam-malam tak leh tidur. Dah la overdue 9 days, duduk hospital before bersalin 2 days, day 3 baru bersalin. Lepas bersalin, susu tak banyak, Dina lapar and nangis the whole nite, hubby lak tak leh teman la kan kat wad. So tujuan mama ambil gynae kat private nih sbb supaya papa leh teman mama during labor (ni hospital gomen pun boley) and after labor.

As for now, I still have some sickness. Masuk baby ketiga ni, dah agak lali sikit. Tapi masih tak larat sangat. Kena kuat semangat..hmmmppphh

I always imagine, how my mom pregnant and gave birth to 8 children. And takes care of us till now. She also has a bad sickness during pregnancies. She fullybreastfeed all 8 of us. And my father was sole provider for the family. He and my mom never have fret or whine on the difficulties. So I hope papa and I won’t fret especially over small things. We are lucky enough to have been blessed with 3 children.

All I do now is hope n pray, my little baby inside me will be born healthy, a great muslim/muslimah and a proud Malaysian. Aminn..

For It's Flu, Not Just A Fever...

2007-09-11T18:43:00.000-07:00

Last Thursday when i went to fetch Dina n Azalea from their nursery, the babysitter told me that both of them are having a fever. Oo'ooo.... Dina body temperature wasn't very high compared to Azalea, coz she already been given medication by the babysitter. While Azalea body temperature was quite high. I was comfirmed that night both my hubby n I wouldn't have a good night sleep.

That night Dina played as usual, but Azalea quietly lie down her head on my laps. I already gave her medications. Dina is easily assured about having to take medication but Azalea on the other hand is so hard.. she will pull, kick, spit...do whatever it takes to get the med out of her mouth. All I did that night was giving her 'Parmol'. When her temperature goes down a bit, she sleeps peacefully. But when the temp went up again, she started to whined...merengek..pusing2..mata pejam. Dina pun sama pulak tuh... I sponged both of them, but Dina didn't give any cooperation. Everytime her clothes gets wet..she asked for new clothes. While Azalea was fine with the sponging, but constantly pulled off 'coolpatch' from her forehead.

Yes, I have to do this to her.. Sorry Lea.. kalau tak Lea tak nak mkn ubat..sob..sob

The next day, i told my hubby, i cannot risk sending Azalea to nursery. I afraid they forget to give her the medication n her condition might get worst. So I stayed home with Azalea, and papa send Dina to Nursery. Not that I'm not worried about Dina health. But Dina can take care of herself. She definitely will ask the babysitter for her medication for she loves taking it. I repeat 'LOVE'.... It's true, dengan mama pun Dina will constantly remind me that it's time for her to take her medications. Of course la tak ikut timing, but as long as she feels that she wasn't well she would deinitely asked for..'ubat kakak'...

Friday evening, Azalea's conditions getting worse. She has runny nose, she cannot swallow her own saliva, milk..let alone food. We brought her to clinics... The doctor told us, 'to our horror', Azalea has 'throat ulcer'. The doctor gave us antibiotics(for azalea had tonsilitis b4, so everytime she has a fever, she has 2 be treated with antibiotics), oral lotion for throat's ulcers, n paracetamol. And that nite, we're having war...me n azalea... Marah betul dia ngan mama mlm tuh.. Sampai hari nih dia tak nak kat mama. And that nite, papa n mama only get to sleep at 4 am..

As on saturday her conditions doesn't get any better, we went for 2nd opinion at other clinic. This time Azalea was given a better medication...or i might said more powerful. Sian nyer anak mama...the ulcers still there. And because she has previous tonsilitis history, whenever she has a fever, her tonsil would definitely swollen n it's painful...uhhh...sedey sgt...sorry mama x jaga adik baik2 sampai kena tosilitis...tsk..tsk...

And then on Sunday nite, I felt so uncomfortable. Plus I still feel nausea. Papa told me to rest..thanks papa. But Monday morning, I wake up with pained all over my body... Papa said my temperature is OK. So I just get ready to work...(as usually..my morning puke takes all the time I have..). With constant morning sickness, puking n vomitting...I usually felt weak until I had my morning breakfast. So usually kalau rase lemah2 pon, aku gagahkan diri drive jugak..nanti dh mkn skit OK la kot. Bread is forbidden, coz it's lead to bloating n more vomitting. But that Monday was different, suddenly I couldn't swallow the 'karipap' i bought. And I ate not even half.. Rase seram sejuk. Then I realised that I drove at 60 kmph...patut la byk keta duk potong aku. Lemah sgt rasa...

As I arrived at my office, I realised my NOSE BLOCK has become runny nose, my eyes burning, my throat ache, my body is in pain. I went to meet my students n told them I don't think I can teach that day. I really hope they understand, coz i've been 'MC'ing few times and had to do a few replacement class. Sian diorg...

I went back to my office, and told Megh n Liena (by skype). Megh asked me to go to clinic, but I told her I had all the flu simptoms but my temp wasn't high. Megh assured me early medications help. Liena reminds me I'm in terms..I'm pregnant. So better get a rest or sumthing ... Thanks gals.. Tapi tak larat jugak nk gi klinik, rasa nk drive balik pon x larat. So I told Megh, I need to lie down..Megh offered to send me to clinics (as usual ;P..tu yg sayang Megh tuh, last time she even offered to use her ID for me so I can get treatments at panels. Tak leh la yang!!), but I have to politely declined. Nak jalan pon rase tak larat. So I lied down n eventually falls asleep.

At 4 pm I went to clinic..And to my dismayed..ramai la pulak org. And I had to wait around half an hour and I haven't had any lunch. And to my suprised, my temp is actually 38 degree celcius. Are u kidding me? I put my hand on my forehead...it wasn't hot. Doc kata, panas dalam tuh... So he gave me MC.

MC again? I wouldn't bluff, who do not love MC's. I like MCs.. but not at this time of the semester. MC means I have to cancel classes. Cancelling classes mean replacements.. Aduhhh...tapi badan mmg tak larat la... Lepas keluar klinik, terus beli mknn..tapi nk mkn x lalu. Beli buah, beli air..Mkn buah je..Air pon x lepas tekak. Slowly I drove home..safely. That nite, both Dina n Azalea throwing tantrums.. buat perangai. And I cried, entah nape nangis lak, sbb tak larat dah sgt2 nk layan diorg kot... tak pun it's my pregnancy hormons.

So yesterday, I just rest at home. Surf the net, makan ubat as prescribed, but couldn't sleep the whole day. Papa has been so nice taking care of everything for 2 days, the babies, foods.. even I know he's damn tired. Thanks papa.. (Actually he's taking care of almost everythings since I got pregnant.. =P )

But last nite, I felt better and as I've finished some marking, I decided to key in marks while watching TV, best la pulak aku tgk hell's kitchen, ghost whisperer (definitely a must), beauty n geek (dh nk abis season, saje la tgk) and Janice Dickinson's Agency. Sedar2 dah pukul 1.30 pagi. This must be the coffee... (lupe lak aku on medication, apsal minum coffee nih?) Konon nk hilangkan loya. Yeah, right..!! Last2 pukul 4 am baru tido, itu pun setelah papa bangun and saw me still in front of laptop and decided to stayed with me in the family hall. Err...tak pe lah papa, jom tido.

Baru nak tidur, Azalea screaming for milk, Dina wakes up and decided she needs to pee.. settled. Baru nak lelap, hp papa nyer alarm screaming at 4.40am!!!. Papa is fast asleep, so I had to bangun..n shut it up. Last2 tertidur jugak only to be awaken by my neighbour car, dengar kereta neighbour nih tau dah 6.15 am. Uhhhuuu... And again terjaga jam 7 am sbb nk solat. Suddenly papa kata dia kena gi awal, so x leh la nk lie down jap (sbb ari nih patut leh dtg lewat skit sbb kelas abis lambat)... Nak mandi... muntah (as usual) tanpa henti...tapi kosong. And last but not least...SAKIT KEPALA!!!!!

For You Are Getting Fat, My Dear

2007-09-03T21:09:00.000-07:00

The Other day while my husband and I prepared ourselves for weekend movie outing, he asked me what he should wear. Knowing my habits of making sure that we wear same color clothes, he usually wouldn't choose his own clothes and happy to wait for me to choose for him. Planning to wear the clothes that have no matching to his, I simply picked a white shirt with nice batik stripes.

When he puts on the clothes, he complained that the shirt I bought for him last year already shrinking. Paying no heed to his comment, I smirkingly said...

"Dear, I don't think it's your shirt, I think it's your tummy getting big!"

In other words my dear hubby is getting more fat at stomach area la. Couldn't blame him coz he cannot play any sport for his health doesn't permit him so. Hearing my comment, he takes a deep breath to hide his figure. Still not satisfied, my husband said that he can see clearly from the mirror that the shirt is getting short.

Being me, and who I’m am... I clearly don't see the point of arguing. So I simply let the matters fall.

On the way to the movie, my hubby seems not so comfortable. So I asked him, what's wrong. Then to my surprised, he said that he thinks that his boxer is also shrinking. And this makes him uncomfortable.

Oh my... Men are always man. So I just laugh my heart out. His behavior reminds me of an email I got few years back. Titled Man are from Mars and Woman From Venus (or vise versa, i dun remember ;P). The email shows the difference between man and woman.

'when a woman tries a clothes and it doesn’t fit them, the said they're getting fat, but when man tries a clothes and it doesn't fit them, they simply thinks that the clothes shrink'. LOL

note : when mama gained weight during pregnancy, papa would definitely gained some weight and eventually lost them after mama gave birth... maybe it's hormonal. OR maybe papa loss weight coz he in charge in taking care of the babies... ehehehhehe

For Those Are The Greatest Friend Not Just Bestfriends

2007-08-21T22:13:00.000-07:00

I was thinking of posting this a few days ago. It was so sentimental of me. I almost cried when i saw her in a wedding dress. 'baju nikah' to be exact. She is that greatest friend... And I have only 2 of those.. For her i dedicated this entry.. (btw,she didn't read my blog ;P)

Those greatest friend is not just bestfriends

Those are the one who did not ask you why u didn't call them, instead they call you

Those are the one who talk directly what they didn't agree infront of your face but backed you up behind you

Those are friend who defend you when others critisized you, in fact they explain to others what are you, and who are you

Those are friend who simply ask you for uncertain news they heard about you

Those are friend who did not ask you to be STRONG when you are down, but they be strong for you

Those greatest friend they have never talks behind you, they tell you straight to your face what went wrong

Those are friend that are hard n rare to find, they have never had a heart feeling or 'terluka' or 'kecik hati' with you because they understand you without you having to explain

Those are friend your parents know by nickname

Those greatest friend come to your rescue, whenever you need them eventhough you have not contacted them for months, infact for year..

Those are friend who are happy for you, and whatever you did or have done with your live

Those are friend who silently forgive you, and you did the same..

I been postponing to post this entry that I lost words. I only have 2 of those greatest friend.. Hoping not to loose them

Bestfriend : I have 3 of them, and Aida my bestfriend during campus life died 2 years ago
(I had never had a chance to tell her she's my bestfriend...sob..sob..)

Some people may ask me how can you count friends like that? For me, greatest friend are rare, bestfriend are countable, but friend are incountable. Trust me, never had i tell them they are my greatest/ bestfriend. But they know who they are... Been knowing them for like more than 10 years. We have never declared we're bestfriend, but we are. They are there during my happiest moment, on my wedding day, during my confinement period, they struggle to come just to meet my juniors.. They know my husband very well n mingle with him as if they are his friend also. My hubby doesn't feel awkward during their attendance and so they are..infact they will simply call my husband hp to reach me..or to find me if i 'lost' for long time...ahakss

I have 2 good friends, ala...only 2 ka? yup...2 good friend who definitely being good and caring

And I have 3 understanding friends who are great, and of course understanding.. we've known each others by heart. We hardly meet, when i said hardly means HARRRRRDDDDLYYYYY... But i adore them dearly for we're from different background and only one similar thing that connect us...our babies.

And, i was hoping that in the future, my babies...Dina and Azalea will meet their greatest and bestfriend of their own. who cherish every moment of their life. Who demand no love but giving it. To accompany then throughout their life, be it single or married, young or old. Of course, to have a greatest friend, there are give n take...but definitely no demand.

My Azalea

2007-08-14T23:00:00.000-07:00

Azalea...Nur Hanis Azalea. I love so much to call her Azalea instead of Nur or Hanis. Azalea in arabic means forever, ‘kekal abadi’. Nur is cahaya, Hanis is takwa. So Nur Hanis Azalea mean Cahaya Takwa Kekal Abadi. I don’t know where in the world did i have the idea of naming my babies with that long name. All i want to is for them to have name that have a sentence of meaning. Instead of each word meaning. Kakak named as Nur Irdina Nasuha meaning Cahaya Kehormatan Kami Suci Murni.

Azalea in scientific is the name of flower. Huhuu...mentang-mentang la mama org science. Acually it was coincidence. I didn’t realised Azalea is the name of flower until a few of my friends (ex-coursemate in Chemistry) reply my msg saying it was nice to name a daughter with name of flower. Masa tuh baru 2 3 hari bersalinkan Azalea. Bukan sorang plak tuh kata Azalea tuh nama bunga, 3 4 org jugak la. Paling best nenek kata, Azalea nama jenama pinggan. Hehehe...memang ada pun.

Azalea is one the Best things that happen to my life. When i’m in my 2nd pregnancy i was just hoping that i can give kakak baby sister. But never had i mentioned that i wanted so much another baby girl. Kalau org tanyer pun paling banyak i’ll said, rasa cam nk baby girl, tp x kisah la baby girl ke boy...janji sihat. But i did know nenek nak cucu boy lagi sorang, coz cucu nenek now 7 girl, 2 boy. (back then before Azalea was borned 6 girls and 1 boy). Tapi Nenek tak kisah. Nenek sayang semua sama. My husband and I called my mom, Nenek n my MIL, Opah. so that the children will understand. Plus it’s easier to differenciate between mak keramat n mak kampar. We always said mak when mention either mak kampar or mak keramat. It has never been mak abg or mak saya. maybe because I don’t feel it appropriate to address my MIL as mak abg, for me once i’m married to their son i’m their daughter. Eh ...tgh cite psl Azalea kan..leh corner ke lain pulak...
Azalea for one thing...is totally different from kakak. She is more active, but focused. Kakak also active but she hardly mingled with other. Lambat kakak nk baik dgn org. But Kakak is a fast learner and yet she’s hardly focused, so much like mama. Azalea mmg lain sgt dari kakak, but dia cepat tangkap apa kakak buat and tiru. And she’s so much like papa, focused...tak leh kacau. Paling haru bile Azalea tiru apa kakak buat and buat lebih advance. Contoh nya, kalau kakak menulis..Azalea akan ikut. But yang Kakak tulis atas kertas, yang Azalea tulis atas kertas, buku cerita, dinding and carpet. Paling haru kakak yang tak pernah conteng dinding pun ikut Azalea. Paling hebat, Azalea conteng tangan and badan. Kakak ikut sekali jek, kena marah.. Kakak tak pernah buat dah. Since she was small like 15 months, kakak dh bole bezakan kemarahan, kegembiraan, pujian dan sebagainya. so kakak kalau kena marah sekejap dah paham. Azalea??? ekekekkeee....ligat, marah la camne pun. Dia diam sat jek Pastu, mama and papa garu kepala..sambil mama taip nih Azalea tgh cuba conteng baju..

Azalea is one of the best things that happen to our life. Pernah mama n papa menitik airmata. syahdu tgk kakak main dgn Azalea. seolah2 our hajat utk bagi kakak teman tercapai. Mmg kalo kecik berdua nih gaduh, mama geram...papa lagi la sejak jaga diorg sendirian sebab mama asyik kursus, bile marah cam ‘blood goes upstairs’ jek. kihkihkih...Tapi bile diorang main gelak-gelak..heaven jek rase..

Azalea jauh beza dengan kakak. Kakak takut org, Azalea berani tapi jinak2 merpati. dekat boleh, sentuh jangan. At the age of 9 months, Azalea dh boleh panjat tangga n kerusi kecil. Panjat merata but umur setahun baru boleh jalan. Kakak failed bab memanjat sampai umur 2 tahun. But actually kakak starts walking at 8 months. Pakai kan kasut, lepas lah Azalea berjalan...huhuuu...jauh pergi nyer. Kakak? selagi boleh menebeng kat mama n papa...heheh...akan menebeng selama mungkin. Langsung tak terpesona dgn tarikan dunia. Kakak is a light sleeper, kalau tinggal dia tido sensorang, tak sampai 15 minit, kakak akan terbangun. Azalea...tidur nyenyak tak hingat. So kalau Azalea tidur tak nyenyak...kitorg paham lah somethings wrong somewhere..

Azalea banyak betul beza dengan kakak. But both are princesses yang teramat kami sayang. Mama yang beria nk baby girl masa mengandung kan kakak. Azalea is the bonus. Memang old saying ada ckp ‘menjaga sekandang kerbau lagi mudah dari menjaga seorg anak perempuan’. Kira mama ada dua kandang kerbau ker? hikhikhik...but deep down I always remember that and pray my princesses will be wanita solehah and taat. Amin. Semoga ‘Cahaya Takwa akan Kekal Abadi’ dan ‘Cahaya Kehormatan Kami itu sentiasa Suci Murni’...

Peminat Kopi Yang Cilik

2007-07-23T22:50:00.000-07:00

Peminat kopi yang cilik : Part 1

Hari tuh mama pegi pasar basah dengan Dina
Mama beli air tin Milo utk Dina and Nescafe (real coffee) utk mama

At the end : Dina minum Nescafe mama, mama terpaksa minum Milo

Peminat kopi yang cilik : Part 2

Hari tuh papa buat Ali Cafe, sambil minum sorok2 kat dapur
Tujuan nyer nak nyorok dr Dina, sekali Dina ter'bau'...
"papa, minum ape tuh?"
"minum teh..."
"nak rasa..."

Terpaksa lah papa bg Dina rasa...
"sedap teh papa, kakak suka"

Mama tanyer,
"kakak minum apa tuh?"
"kakak minum Kopi papa..."

Ahahaha...dpt jugak dia detect tu kopi, bukan teh..